Our daughter is 30 and has been around boats, since she was a little girl. I think as parents sometimes we inadvertently put a ceiling on our kids. I would like to share a couple of stories about Kelly and our adventures that are evidence that those with Cognitive Disabilities on the Spectrum can do and participate fully in life.
Our Kelly, loves the water and grew up in an amazing YMCA in Boise, ID. One of the first joint Aquatic Centers between Boise City and the Y. Within a few short years, Boise kids were competing at high levels for National and Olympic seats. On the flip side was Kelly, who went to practice every day, struggled with her strokes and technique. She figured out that if no one else swam a race no matter how slow she was, she would win a First Place Ribbon. More importantly, Kelly learned to swim, respect, and love the water, and made wonderful friends. We had a Waterski boat for years, and camped in scenic mountains, in Hells Canyon, Idaho. Great water-skiing country. It took Kelly two years before she was willing to get behind the boat and try. That day she accomplished her goal. It took hours, and that final warning, if you don’t get up this time we have to come back tomorrow. That was it, she got up. From that point, it flowed for her. What was amazing to us was her form, it was neat perfect. She was so excited that she could ski, and she loved it. One thing we can remember was how fast she was going, and she didn’t get scared. During a week on Royal Caribbean, Buddy Cruise, her love of the water shifted to snorkeling in Roaatan, Honduras. This time Kelly, her big sister and Mom were snorkeling, and Dad was Scuba Diving all from the same boat. As we were snorkeling Kelly spotted her dad below and took a big breath and dove down and tapped him on the shoulder. The Guide, her dad and I were shocked. She was fine wondering what the fuss was about.
When we bought our sailboat, we brought her to visit us on the boat. She was afraid, especially when the boat heeled. There were challenges getting on and off the boat at the dock. Moving around the boat when underway, was also challenging, and then of course a bout of seasickness. Every time Dad was at the helm, topping out at 6 knots, our white-knuckle flyer would say– Mom you need to fix the boat, Dad is tipping the boat over, come fix it! Funny, she always was more comfortable with Mom at the helm. What really worked was teaching her how to tack and pull the lines in using the winch. Getting her up to the helm with one of us. We began teaching her how to drive the boat. Obviously, never in crowded areas, unsupervised or any place put the open ocean with the right conditions. Each time on the boat she gained confidence and knowledge.
Kelly lives full time in Boise, ID where she grew up. She loves to travel and has conquered all the major airports, that some adults avoid.
Airports, how on earth do we do it? Cell phone in hand, and frequent updates, we know exactly what, and where she is. She has been known to volunteer her seat and take later flights, usually for a gift card, which she spends before boarding her flight. Upon landing a phone call is made checking in, status updates are frequent throughout the airport. Then she spots us, and a reunion and hugs are always plentiful. She loves to travel, meet new people and be on the boat with her parents. It is fun to see her loving the ocean, the dolphins, swimming, snorkeling and just enjoying family time. Stepping beyond her fears.
It has been our experience that Kelly wants to live independently and loves visiting her parents on the boat. She loves the water, just like Dad & Mom. She is confident and embraces her fear and steps forward. So many lessons can be learned from Kelly.